Your lesson is to conquer jealousy and anger in yourself and then in those who will select you as their guide. You should understand that these weaknesses are caused by fear and self-regret.
What's your past life? Did you ever think that maybe you were not the person you were in your past? Do you often remember things that cannot be explained? Is Incarnation- even real?
I just don't know the answers. When I typed my birthday, pressed the 'press for diagnosis' button, I was surprised. I was an alchemist, chemist, even a poison manufacturer! I just ignored these things, but isn't it... Amazing?
The thing that I liked most was the 'lesson' that my past life brought me to my present incarnation. I really need to overcome jealousy and anger in myself. I don't think that my self-esteem would rise up anymore. There are things that made me feel so small.
Thus, I am afraid. How can I overcome this fear?
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Sweet Sixteens
Why is everyone turning sixteen? Alas, It's another special birthday. There were two celebrants, Adet and Kimberly. I'm glad they liked the 'surprise' and the cake we gave them.
Sweet Sixteen! (Ver. 4?)
The Celebrants!.jpg)
Meet the lollipops...
... and the lolligirls! (Thea, Daph, Kayan, Angel)
Thea!
Q, Moi!, Grace
Jay, Steve
This is why you shouldn't bring PSP with you.
Us! Kim, Thea, Kayan, Queenie, Jaymark, Steve, Grace, Kim, Adet, ME, Angel, Faj, Grace!
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Girl scout experience
The first time I wore the green, weird over-all, was in grade 4. I was a Junior Girl scout. I had no certain reason of joining the girl scout. I just remembered how Maureen, my bestfriend back then, endlessly convinced me that we will have a great time.
I also remembered my first 'camping' at our school. The first time I entered the school, I was crying. We had no tent. Maybe, at that time, reality hit me. Where will we sleep? No bed. No everything.
Good thing Ma'am Lacson, the scoutmaster accomodated a tent. If not, I would totally freak out. I hid my cellphone in my bag so I would be able to text my mom anytime. I remembered how uncomfortable my first day was. Sleeping was hard- I considered flies as my worst enemies. I was re-applying "off lotion" every five minutes.
As expected, the first night was sleepless. My tentmates and I even had a big argument that eventually led us to The scoutmaster's office. It was horrible.
I also experienced campfires- sang songs, talked and bonded with other girl scouts. Somehow, I had fun despite the fact that I couldn't sleep- and I missed my bed!
Then, morning came. It was an early morning, not the time that I usually wake up. I found myself soaking in the hot sun, cooking breakfast. Burnt fish for breakfast! My groupmates grew angry at me because I destroyed our breakfast. Good thing I still had my cellphone and ta-daaa... We had a breakfast, lechon manok.
After that camping experience, I never entered girl scout again. I only re-entered for extra-curricular, when I was in third year. Experience taught me a lot. Being a girl scout has taught me a lot.
With the blink of an eye, I found myself loving the movement. I will soon (hopefully!) be a Cadet scout. I found myself digging holes and touching soil- which, by the way, is one of my dislikes. I found myself cutting bamboos to build a table. Worst of all, I found myself wearing my brother's loose clothes.
I had found happiness in things that I never would've expected I would enjoy. It's true that we can turn bad things into good. Like what I did in girl scouting, I turned it into something good. Myabe, God just wanted to test me and put me outside my comfort zone, so He may mold me to be the person I am in the present.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Somewhere out there
Somewhere, out there- in an unknown world, life may exist. A world which we do not know, but imagine. I started to dream about that world, wondering what it looked like. Is it really possible to be thrown away to another dimension? I dare to question Albert Einstein, sceptical about his theory.
I wonder how he thought of such things. How he, could make time go faster-or slower. Tell me, what would another world look like? Is it as amazing as the one we are living? Is it as tough? Is it as fun? Is it as exciting? Is it as hard? Is it as unpredictable?
Somewhere in an unknown world I call, non-existent, I would pass the chance and stay in this world. My world- where my family, friends, and other precious people live in. I want to live my time not as E=mc2 but as 60 seconds, 60 minutes, 24 hours, 30 days and 12 months. It's not a lot, but it's better than living in a non-existent world.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Positive thinking
UPCAT- August 14 or 15, 2007 (First step towards college!)
UP Diliman: BS Hotel, Restaurant Industry Management
BS Interior Design
UP Visayas: BS Food Technology
BS Public Health
BS Interior Design
UP Visayas: BS Food Technology
BS Public Health
It's funny, isn't it? I, being a clueless senior having no idea of what course to take in College? I, being a clueless senior thinking and daydreaming about entering my choice of University- being a kolehiyala? I, being a clueless senior who is too afraid to face those dreaded University Application forms?
Funny.
The UP Application Form is the first form that I have filled in. It's the first form that made me realize, Ohmy?! What course will I choose? Why am I even filling up this form if I know I will fail? -What if I will fail?! Where will I go? Oh nooo! Different thoughts came rushing down my mind like a tsunami. Is it normal? Or, am I paranoid?
My worries won't get me anywhere. It won't get me to any University if I overthink. I believe that I will have more application forms to face, but I don't want to face it with worries on my mind. "Positive thinking is the key to success"- I got that from a poster at our classroom.
Positive thinking. Positive thinking. Positive thinking.
Saturday, June 09, 2007
Whew!
The first few days of school went well. I enjoy waking up 5 or 6 in the morning and dressing up for school. I enjoy doing dozens of homework- it keeps me busy. I enjoy listening to boring teachers teach boring lessons (Cough... Physics... Cough!). I enjoy the thrill of being busy. I enjoy school life!
I don't know why, but it seems like I've become a nerd. Nerd?! I was allergic to that word, but now... Er- I think I am becoming one. No kidding. I don't know why I'm reading my Economics book for no reason.- I don't know why I'm thinking about school 24/7.
It's just supercalifrajilisticexpialidocious. I guess I'm just up to the experience. I want to do all the things that people never expected me to do. Oh puh-lease...!
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Oh, she's all that. I think.
She had a towering height of 5'9, I suspect. She had a model-like figure with her milky complexion, dressed in elegance. She wore luxurious jewelries like those in Nelly's "Grillz" music video or in Fergie's "Glamorous" music video. She was holding different shopping bags, which marks her posh lifestyle. She stood out of the crowd because of all these qualities- Oh, she's all that.
Sadly, a mere cellphone conversation changed all my thoughts. While she was talking to someone in her cellphone, she did a little 'dialing'- err, a term which here means, 'picking with her nose'.
I can't believe how she could pick her nose in public- and she did it with her index finger, that makes her more disgusting.
She may blind everyone with her expensive clothes and her oh-so-flattering frame. She may shop all she wants and buy all those nice clothes, but I pity her because she can't buy the thing she needed most: Proper manners!
Truth to be told: Beauty and good manners come together, without manners, it's not beauty at all.